First, before the hate mail and death threats begin, I love the Orphan Black series. I only get into one or two TV series a year. Mostly I'm watching movies...and college football when it's in season....but hey, don't hold that against me! I'm not exactly sure when or how I found this show. Most likely a commercial came on during Dr Who. Whatever it was, I started catching up on the first shows and never looked back.
The problem for me though, is that I really...really...expect my shows to be as realistic as possible. I don't mean that it can't stretch the envelope or 'go where no man has gone before". It just needs to make sense in some way or another. So when Orphan Black strayed off the path, I did my best to look the other way and hope it wasn't there when I looked back. Unfortunately, they seem to have this penchant for going to that dark place for me.
I'm not talking about plot twists or new mystery characters either. Game of Thrones has nothing on Orphan Black in that category! (disclosure - until I lost my HBO, GoT was another show I watched WAY too much of). No, my problem is much more basic than that. So, here are the top 10 things in Orphan Black that are like nails scratching on a chalk board for me (do they still make caulk boards...TBT??!!):
1) Why doesn't anybody move...or even try to hide?!! Right from the beginning, with the police, drug-dealing boyfriends, Dyad and god knows who else looking for them nobody moves!! What...I mean...what??!! And every week it's the same thing. Someone from some not-so-nice faction shows up on the same doorsteps trying to kill someone, kidnap someone or steal something.
2) Why is Sarah in charge? She gives loose cannons a bad name. 'Reactionary' should have her picture next to it in the dictionary. I mean, do any of her plans/strategies last longer than the commercial breaks?!
3) Does anyone else think that Helena should maybe NOT be wandering loose in the world? This woman has issues...like the Sahara has sand. Somehow part of her therapy is playing with everyone's
kids??!!...and passed around the family like their old aunt. Did we
forget that just a few episodes back she was a murderous psychopath? [6-13-2015 update...I rest my case...but you gotta just love her direct approach to solving problems! Like riding a bike...you never really forget how.]
4) What's with that kid anyway? I assume at some point we're going to actually get some explanation as to why this kid can see the future...read minds...and whatever other magic powers she seems to have.
5) Doesn't anybody actually finish investigating murders? If I remember right, there have been at least three or four murders/suicides on the show. Yet, even after Art and Sarah were out of the picture, no one seems interested in figuring out why they keep finding bodies with identical DNA. Or maybe that just gets boring for the cops too after a while...same old thing and all.
6) They don't move! (See #1....yeah, this is just f**king stupid)
7) How many different times can you "coincidentally" have to impersonate each other? Can you say 'jump the shark'? Seriously....this is probably the most annoying part of the show for me. It reminds me of every bad 50's movie or TV show that tried to use the old mistaken identity ploy. One more of these and I'm going to ruin a perfectly good TV.
8) Where are these new clones coming from? Didn't anybody keep track of these damn things?!...or were they just too busy killing off the scientists to be bothered back then? And if Dyad couldn't locate them back at the beginning, and hasn't been able to track them down in all these years, how are they popping up now? Another mystery......although, maybe if she does play, like a thousand roles, she'll at least get nominated for an Emmy...
7) How many different times can you "coincidentally" have to impersonate each other? Can you say 'jump the shark'? Seriously....this is probably the most annoying part of the show for me. It reminds me of every bad 50's movie or TV show that tried to use the old mistaken identity ploy. One more of these and I'm going to ruin a perfectly good TV.
8) Where are these new clones coming from? Didn't anybody keep track of these damn things?!...or were they just too busy killing off the scientists to be bothered back then? And if Dyad couldn't locate them back at the beginning, and hasn't been able to track them down in all these years, how are they popping up now? Another mystery......although, maybe if she does play, like a thousand roles, she'll at least get nominated for an Emmy...
9) Can someone please explain to me just who the hell is Delphine...or whatever the hell her name is? She seems to have gone from exchange-student/lover to Dyad spy to Queen of everything Dyad...with no explanation as to the miracle metamorphosis. 10) Yes, you may have guessed it...THEY DON'T MOVE!! (See #1...again) I mean come-on guys...hide or something...for god's sake!!
So, having said that, I'll be watching...and recording...the last two episodes of this season. Realizing also that they're either going to have to come through with the secrets and connections with all these clones in the next season or two. Otherwise, we're likely to see a regular shark jumping fiesta in the not too distant future. [6-13-2015 update - well, I didn't see THAT coming...can't even imagine what the finale will be like!]
